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U-N-l-V-E-R-S-A-L.
Universal. Y'all been large for years. Yo, Spike, start the movie, G.
Flavor Flav, you've done it again.
He's gotta come outside.
Every time we waste our time here, we always missin' games.
Yo, Bleek!
- You coming out to play? - You're wasting time on him.
l know, man. Yo, Bleek!
We're going to miss the game!
Boys! Boys!
Boys, please be quiet!
Sorry, Mrs Gilliam, we wanted to know if Bleek can come out.
l understand that, but this noise has got to stop.
- Psst! - Oh, man!
Bleek.
Bleek!
l told you to tell your friends not to come around.
Leave the boy alone.
- Can l go outside now? - When you've finished.
- What about then? - We'll see.
- Let the boy be a boy, have some fun. - He could be a bum for all you care.
Running the streets with those kids.
Almost wlthln walklng dlstance of Forbes Fleld.
He ls just 21 years old.
That child's going to drive me up the wall. Go tell them to go home.
- You don't let me do nothing. - You hear what l said?
Go tell him to go home.
Bleek!
Bleek.
Are you coming out?
Yo, Ty, what'd l tell you about that stuff?
- Are you coming out? - When l'm done.
- Done what? - Finished my lesson.
- Forget him. - We're going.
- l said l'll see you later. - l'm glad my moms ain't like your moms.
- She lets me do whatever l want. - Me, too.
- Come on down, you fucking bum! - Giant, who you cursing at?
- You! - You're a effing bum.
- l'll see you later. - We'll see you later, mama's boy.
- Sissy. - Who you calling a sissy?
- You! - You're a sissy, sissy.
When l finish my lessons, l'll come down.
- Man, he does this every time. - Thanks for nothing.
We'll win the game without you.
Bleek! Get your butt out of that window.
Throw the ball, man!
Mommy, l never get to play with my friends.
Now they callin' me a sissy. l ain't no sissy.
- A sissy?! - Don't pay those fools no mind.
l'm sick and tired of the trumpet. l hate the trumpet!
All the money l paid for that horn? You must be losing your mind.
- You better play that trumpet. - Look...
That child will drive me up the wall.
- Don't say that. - l can say it if l want to...
You got a lot of time to be with your friends.
- Like when? - l don't want you to grow up like them.
- After your lessons. - l have to play this stupid trumpet.
- This instrument can be your friend. - Shut up! Shut up!
- l'm not having this. - We'll go to a game.
- l don't want to go. - l got a game on, OK?
- Go look at it. - You spoiled him rotten.
He's not worth a damn. Listen. Shut up! Don't you talk back to me.
l want you to pick up the horn, and you're going to play the scales.
Do you hear me? And you're going to do it right now.
Boy, l think you better do what your mother says, OK? Now?
Moose ls worklng on a no-hltter.
l still hate it.
Good boy. Damn. l'm missing the game. lt's for the pennant here.
He's a chucker, man. He comes off the bench shooting, Bleek.
Never gonna see no pass from this guy. He's a selfish ballplayer.
You need to get rid of him.
lt's your team. lt's your band. You're the coach. Fire his ass.
Every night, three-hour solos. Bleek, what's up?
lt's your band.
Get rid of this guy. Go out there and play.
Great.
God.
Bleek, just talk to the guy, all right?
Talk to him.
All right!
Left Hand Lacey on the piano.
Left Hand.
The earl himself. The earl of rhythm.
- Rhythm Jones on the drums. - Thank you. Thank you.
On the bottom, the bass, Bottom Hammer.
- Rock bottom, that's my man! - Bottom Hammer.
On tenor and soprano saxophone, Shadow Henderson.
- Shadow Henderson. - Shadow, l love you.
- My name is Bleek Gilliam. - He's the best, huh?
- He's the best, that guy. - The best.
Your band! lt's your band!
Thank you for coming. You didn't have to.
You could have stayed home and watched Arsenio Hall or something.
No, listen, l got nothing against the brother.
But er... thank you again for coming.
This concludes our first set. We'll be back soon.
We got some beautiful waitresses here, so put them to work.
Give them some business and a fat tip.
Speaking of fat...
Don't get mad, Bleek. l'll kick your ass.
l know l'm gonna hear it now. Butterbean.
Whoo!
Nice, boy. Nice set.
You see them girls out in front? The girl in purple?
When she crossed her legs, l saw sparks fly.
- What's up, man? - She got a big baseball booty.
Oh, man, she was fine!
She was looking at me the whole show.
She was looking at me the whole motherfucking show, man.
Yo, cut the bullshit, hold up.
Shadow, what's up with this ego stuff? What's up with the outing?
- Grandstanding! - You're the only one complaining.
- Everybody else is OK. - Everybody who?
The audience got no problem.
All you doing is playing for the audience?
- That's what l do. - That's ego, grandstanding.
- Do l tell you what to play? - ls your name on the marquee?
- Shadow sounds good, man. - Who asked you, Left Hand?
- Nobody asked me. - Well, shut the fuck up!
What the fuck is this? You shut the fuck up, you midget!
- My name is Giant, all right? - Blame your motherfucking mother, man.
- On the real side. - Why you talking about my mother, man?
- Stop talking about my mother. - On the real side.
Yo, chill. Everybody chill for one second.
Relax on the solos, OK? Bring them down a little bit, all right?
- Could you do that for me? - Down to an hour.
Maybe an hour, 45 minutes?
You do have an option. You can always quit.
- What? - Don't be playing with my balls.
- Yo, hold up, man. - Here, take your balls.
Well, you right. You right. l could quit.
- Hey, wait a minute! - He ain't going nowhere.
- Where you going? - To the bathroom, right?
- l'm going to the bathroom. - He's always going.
l like women with big asses. Why brothers drive Oadillacs.
Can't get all that ass in a Volkswagen.
The first thing they be saying, ''Kiss my ass''.
Some ugly women in here, too, tonight.
How you doing?
When l said ugly, l'm looking at your ass.
l like an ugly woman. They easy to get along with.
Pretty woman, too... You know how they do.
''Fuck you. l'll do what l want to do.''
Ugly woman easy to get along with. They don't want no trouble.
You can tell an ugly woman anything, can't you?
Hey, bitch, l'm going to the moon. l'll be back in a couple of days.
''Well, you be careful.''
''l don't want nothing to happen to you now, cos you know l...
cos l love you.''
''Oh, l love you.''
''Please don't call me a bitch in front of the kids.''
All right, whore, l'll be back in a couple of days. Goddamn.
Hey. Hey, wake up.
- l'm up. - Wake up. You're not up.
- l'm up. l'm up. - You're not up.
l'm up. l do not want to go to school today, OK?
l'm not going.
Get up, get up, get up!
l'm up now.
You'll be late for school.
Your children will have their little hearts broken.
Yeah, speaking of broken hearts, Bleek,
you know what my mother used to tell me?
She used to say, ''Don't ever marry a musician,
let alone go out with one.''
She said l'd be inviting grief and pain and tears and heartbreak to my doorstep.
Your mother wasn't talking about me.
Maybe not.
You're a good brother, Bleek, but you still don't know what you want.
Guess it's time for confessions of a modern-day dog, huh?
Well,... like it or not,... you're a dog.
You are a dog.
You're a good doggy, a nice dog, but you're a dog nonetheless.
What can l say? l'm not going to argue the point.
You know how l am.
- With men, it's a dick thing. - A dick thing?
A D-l-O-K thing.
Hey, Bleek, you're late.
Three minutes.
Probably one of your lady friends held you up.
- Hi, Mr Gilliam. - Hello.
Sorry l can't stop. l'm late for school. Bye-bye.
- What? - You something else, you know that?
- How's the arm? - l'm off the disabled list.
You love her?
l like her.
You like her. What about the others?
l like her, too. l like women.
Just be careful.
Don't bring babies into this world until you're married.
lf l see another 16-year-old, black, unwed mother,
pushing a stroller, a baby in one arm, another on the way,
l don't know what l'll do.
- l hear you. - l can still smoke 'em.
Come on with it.
That's it, that's it. That's enough.
l felt a twinge.
Come upstairs. l'll ice it down for you.
No. l'm going back home.
All right. l'll call you later.
All right.
- Take care of that arm, all right? - lt's just old age.
- Olarke, what time is it? - One o'clock pm.
- What does that mean? - You're practlslng.
That's right. lt means l'm practising.
lf you know l'm practising and l don't finish practising till 2:00,
which is another 60 minutes, why you buzzing my buzzer?
Because l want to see you.
- What is that supposed to mean? - That means let me up.
- And who are you? - l'm Clarke.
How many times do l have to tell you?
l have a certain time allotted for daily practice.
You know this, yet you consistently overlook my programme.
l get the times mixed up.
Everything with you is so damn regulated.
A certain time to do this, a certain time to do that.
Everything's on a schedule, a timetable.
- Loosen up, tight ass. - Let me explain something to you.
Life is short, OK?
l need it like this to get everything done. l like order.
Order's fine, but you're ridiculous.
And what do you want?
l want a man who knows what he wants. Decisive.
You don't know what you want.
Make up your mind to be a man and don't be wishy-washy on me.
l know what l want. My music. Everything else is secondary.
- l knew you would say that. - Then why'd you ask?
Brother,... if your music is the be all to end all, as you state,
to ensure that you better get rid of Giant as your manager.
Olarke, stay out of my business, OK?
Are you screwing him, or what? He's a horrible manager.
Everybody can see that but you.
Why bring this confusion into my home?
l'm looking out for your best interest.
Oh.
l see.
- Bleek. - Mm?
l'm not saying l'm a brain surgeon, but everybody's a teacher.
People can teach you two things, what to do and what not to do.
Say something.
Let's make love.
For once, let's be real.
What you and l do is not ''make love''.
- What would you call it? - lt's definitely not making love.
- Boning? - You've been more imaginative.
- You ever heard of the mo' better? - Mo' what?
Mo' better makes it mo' better.
That's what we do. We don't make love because you don't love me.
But in the meantime, l'll settle for some of that mo' better.
Yeah. l knew you would.
Step back.
Open your coat.
Take off your clothes.
Ow!
- l'm sorry. - You bit my lip.
Oh, shit. ls it bleeding? What you laughing at?
- l was playing. - Don't play with my lips.
l'm sorry. Jesus Christ, l said l'm sorry.
Damn, she done cut my...
You're nuts!
Want me to kiss it to make it mo' better?
This shit ain't funny, man.
l was joking.
All right, l won't ever kiss you again.
That's good.
l make my living with my lips.
Why don't you clean this place up? lt's filthy.
Oleanliness is next to godliness, right?
This is the last time l carry you.
l want to play the full schedule today.
Start with the National League.
The Pirates play the Mets in a doubleheader.
Give me the Pirates in both games. The Mets need more black ballplayers.
Give me the Reds over the 'stros,
Expos over the Phillies, Braves over the Dodgers,
Oubs over the Oardinals, the Giants over the Padres.
ln the American League, the Yankees over the Tigers,
even though Steinbrenner needs to go.
Brewers over the Red Sox, Orioles over the Jays.
That's my main man, Frank Robinson.
Yucca, barbecue, Oreo cookies.
lndians over the White Sox, the Twins over the Mariners,
A's over the Royals, and Angels over Rangers.
lce cream, tamale, arroz, azucar. All of that?
All of that.
Give me two C-notes on each game.
- Can you cover that? - Just make the bet.
Two C-notes on each?
Two C-notes on each game. l'm coming back, Petey.
lt's never over till it's over.
- Will you stop with that? - l rehearse my luck.
This is my luck.
- What does it look like? - lt looks good.
The numbers look good. Numbers never lie.
That's why l like numbers. People lie from the crib, but not numbers.
Moe, the numbers never lie.
- But human beings? - Human beings is another story.
You meet some shmendrick.
The guy says ''Yes. No. Maybe'' but you never know, right?
- But not numbers. Three and three? - Six.
You know what l'm saying? A guy tells you it's done, right?
But you don't know. He could be in back doing something to somebody,
and you don't know.
- Seven and seven? - Fourteen.
- Eight and eight? - Sixteen.
- Nine and nine? - Eighteen.
Firm. Concrete. lt's like a solid walk, understand?
That's what a lot of people don't understand.
They want to give you, you know... But a number's right there.
- You can see it, right? - You can't buy trust, right?
l trust my mother sometimes.
Hey! Hey!
Hey, l'm walking here.
l was walking. Fuck your mother!
Your mother!
Whoa! Whoa!
Money, back it on up. No midgets getting in tonight.
l'm sorry. You know my name is Giant.
- Every night we go over this. - All right then, no giants allowed.
Come off the giant tip. You're not a giant.
- Go home and take a nap. - When are you gonna let the people in?
Lines are good for business, which you know nothing about.
- ls that Moe and Josh talking? - Black men can't have a smart thought?
- No, because you're stupid. - Why is it always the white man?
The black man is God.
l'm sick and tired of your Five Percenter malarkey.
lt's not Five Percenter. lt's Five Percent.
Five percent of what?
Five percent of the population knows what's going on,
the gods of this planet, the original Asiatic black man from Africa
with knowledge of self, sent here to teach the 85%
that you're dumb, deaf, and blind.
You're being exploited by the devilish ten percent.
- Don't cut my wisdom! - You're talking garbage!
Acknowledge it! People should've been in long time ago.
Don't be looking at your Timex. The people get in when l want them to.
- And when is that? - Whoa, whoa!
The time is when, God. Lounge.
The both of you can kiss my narrow black butt... two times.
Twice.
Kiss your narrow black butt two times?
What if l kick you on your flat back once and watch you grow a butt?
Relax, man.
You ain't got no butt. You just got two legs sticking out your shoulders.
Lounge, man. Go in peace, my brother.
- One day you'll be righteous. - You look like a Slim Jim in a suit.
Lounge, man.
That's what the devil wants, us fighting each other.
- Where's Left? - Late again.
- B, every day it's like this. - Yeah, l know, l warned him.
- We have to talk to this guy. - l talked to him earlier.
- When? - l'll bet he's with Jeanne.
That's a sucker's bet.
- Take off, shit. - Sorry l'm late.
You cannot find cab in New York Oity.
Left, you're late again.
We said we're sorry, OK?
- All right, all right. - OK, OK.
What did l miss?
lf your late sorry ass would've been here, you'd have missed nada.
- We're about to go over the numbers. - Then l didn't miss anything.
- Damn. - What's the matter with that brother?
Jeanne, could you excuse us, please?
Just one minute. l'll be finished, just one minute.
- Tighten this up up here. - OK, OK.
- Could you excuse us, please? - Just a minute. l'm finishing.
What is wrong with that brother?
Left, get her the fuck out of here! Let's go!
Jeanne.
l'm going to be down front.
English. Speak English.
Bullshit accent. She's from Queens.
The wrong key, Left. The wrong key bringing your lady in here.
- Let it go. - Why are you so hard on my lady?
Why?
Your lady's been fucking up.
Nobody's allowed back here, especially when we're about to hit.
Everybody else's woman respects that shit except her.
- No, no. lt's because she's white. - Cos she's white?
- Yes. - Come on.
That's why you all dog her.
- Get a grip, Left. - You remind me of my brother.
He was an Archie comic book freak.
That's where all his money went.
- Yeah, he looks like Jughead. - ls this a long story?
Shut up and listen.
They had these pinups of Betty and Veronica in a bathing suit.
One day, he tore them out, Scotch taped them to the wall.
- And? - And my moms walked in.
She saw red. l knew there was going to be trouble.
l said, ''Mommy, get Larry, it was his idea.''
''lf l ever...'' Whack. ''...see any white women...'' Whack, whack.
''...on my walls again, in my house, l'll kill you.''
l started to cry, ''Mommy, don't kill him. That's my only brother.''
- ''He loves Betty and Veronica.'' - And the moral of the story is?
There is no moral to the story. Keep that croosant-eating heifer out of here.
lt's croissant. And show some respect. Don't disrespect her like that.
She's good to me, so have some respect.
- You show some respect. - Respect the dressing room.
- Yeah, man, respect yourself. - Do right, Left.
- You're jealous. - Jealous?
Couldn't pull a French girl. She's an educated woman.
She went to the Sorbonne. You don't know where it is.
- Sore buns? - You can get it on 125th Street.
She's a sister, you know.
- Oh! She's a sister? - Sister? What kind of sister?
- She's a nun. - She's Joan of Arc's sister.
- lgnorant. You're ignorant black men. - l got a Chinese girl.
- She can cook, too. - You guys are justjealous.
Jealous?
Do l talk about your women? The women up on that wall?
Them women over there?
That's a sister.
And they go on a wall, right? This is my sister right here.
Here, man, a real woman. You make a choice.
That's cold. That's cold.
Don't be throwing the sisters around.
You guys are absolutely disgusting.
Take that shit off my mirror!
- Respect the black woman. - No, you respect my space.
- This is the queen. - This is my space.
You take the queen.
The bottom line is you were late. You brought your lady in here.
Don't do that anymore. Everybody knows the rules.
Left, you're fucking up.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Moe and Josh Flatbush and Beneath The Underdog
proudly present for your listening enjoyment
the Bleek Quintet.
Thank you.
Did you see them lines?
- We got eyes. - We got ears.
Bleek has consistently packed the joint.
- We're pleased. - We're more than pleased.
- We're ecstatic. - Fabulous.
We want more money. You're making a killing. What's fair is fair.
No. What we're paying you now is fair,
and it's what you agreed upon.
You want to take food out of our kids' mouths?
- lf we had it, we'd give it to you. - But we don't have it.
- Ever heard of the word renegotiate? - Out of the question.
$15 cover charge, three-drink minimum, dinner starts at $25.
You guys are making money hand over fingers.
- What about the artist? - Don't hand me that artist doo-doo.
They don't have any financial risks. Go listen to the music, huh?
- You think Bleek's Elvis? - There's only one Elvis.
- There's only one king in music. - And that starts with an ''E''.
Oome on. Go shoot some hoops. Gimme some moves, huh?
Let me eat my sushi.
Black queen.
l mean, my slice of pie. The apple of my eye.
My chicken thigh, extra spicy.
Ham, Spam.
Eggs and bacon, chicken and waffles. From Wilsons.
How you doing, baby? You're looking good to me.
- What happened to you, Bleek? - What happened to me?
- l've been waiting for twenty years. - Twenty...
My watch must be going slow, lt says 15 years, but l'll get it fixed.
Baby, you should have been down the club. We was kicking butt.
- Good. l'm glad it went well. - l wish you were there.
- You know how l feel about clubs. - No. How do you feel?
All that smoke!
l'd rather sit at home and listen to your records.
l mean, bothering with all them people, it's not my thing.
- What are you talking about? - What do you mean?
- What are you saying? - What am l saying?
Be specific? What am l saying? l'm saying that l love your music,
but l don't like sitting up in some club.
That's all you're saying? You're not upset cos l'm late?
- No. That's something different. - l see.
Shall we go upstairs? Want to talk about it upstairs?
- We might, could. - We might, could? Oh!
- Now. l'm not waiting anymore. - We might, could.
l used to coulda, woulda, shoulda. That sounds like a good song.
What would you do, Bleek, if you couldn't play anymore?
Probably roll up in a corner and die.
l'd play at my own funeral, though.
l want to bite your neck.
No!
The other side.
- No! - The other side.
The middle.
The lips.
Yes, the lips.
There's more blood in the lips.
- Don't be afraid. - No!
- Giant. - Son of a bitch.
Giant.
Seen the paper?
l can read.
Can you count? Cos you owe me.
- You know l'm good for it. - You're way over as it is.
- Are you going to carry me or what? - You're going to give me a hernia.
My man, l feel good about this one.
- Shoot. - Come on, let's go.
Mets, Oards, Astros, Phillies, Dodgers and the Padres.
The full menu. How much?
500 on each game.
You're grown up. You're a big boy.
- That's what they say. - l swear on my mother...
No mas. No more. No mas.
Roberto Duran.
Roberto, si. Giant, no mas. No more. No mas.
l talked to Moe and Josh. We're going to get our money.
- l'm working hard. - Stay on top of that.
Look, why don't you run this to Shadow's crib?
lt's a serious piece. l borrowed it.
He'll get it.
lt's about time.
Bleek borrowed this a year ago. This is a rare, out-of-print Bird.
Just stand there, brother. Better not be no scratches on here, either.
Lucky.
Tell your bitch don't ask for nothing if it takes a year to return it.
l don't want to hear that bitch stuff.
Look, l'm a delivery man. Any static, take it up with Bleek.
l'm spacing.
No, no, no, hold on.
- Er... l need your help. - How long is it going to take?
Hey, no time.
- Should l change the sheets? - They need changing.
No, see, l was blending this honey in here.
So l don't want my lady to catch me.
- You smell perfume, man? - Shadow, you've lost your mind.
No, do you smell perfume?
No.
Smell the sheets, man!
Smells all right to me.
l don't know why l'm asking you anyway, man.
She has a highly developed sense of smell.
She could sniff me out five miles away.
l think she must be part canine and shit.
Yo, you know what? She counts my rubbers, man.
- No. - Yes.
The woman was an accountant major in school.
So she takes an accurate account of my jimmys.
Now l got to go buy a whole nother box so she won't bust me again.
One time l rid around the city, man,
and l searched for a box of 12 dozen blue Trojans, ribbed,
with the receptacle end, lubricated with the garden-fresh scent.
Daggone girl knows everything.
Why bother?
Well, l like her, number one.
Number two... she's a mother in bed.
- Mm-hm. - Number three, the rest don't matter.
Three good reasons.
Roll over.
- Yes, baby. - No, the other way.
Yes,... baby.
- Ow! Baby. - That was a good one.
- Damn, that hurt. - Be still.
All right. Be careful.
- How are your singing lessons? - Good. l think l'm ready.
You think you're ready?
Ready to accompany the band for a song at the Dog.
You think l'm not ready?
Wait, look, baby, erm...
just cos we're seeing each other it's nothing to do with the music.
Now, l think that...
l think you got potential, but it takes years, not months.
- Thanks for nothing. - l'm not trying to be cruel.
lf we were married, l'd say the same thing.
- Look... - Ow!
l'm not asking you or anybody else for any handouts.
Everybody needs a break. l thought you might be the person.
Shoot me, l was wrong. Pop your own bumps.
You know, a lot of people say l'm a good singer.
Good. Go sing with them.
Forget you. l believe in myself.
You're supposed to believe in yourself.
- Shadow says l can sing. - Oh, ''Shadow says l can sing.''
What else does Shadow say?
A-minor seventh.
A-minor seventh. That'll work.
Seventh.
B13# eleven.
No, that's not right.
- Does it tickle? - Yeah.
- That's not right. - Let me leave the artist at work alone.
The muse is visiting him. Bleek is truly inspired.
Then he will share his new, latest gift to the world.
- Hallelujah.
Please, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
this is something that came in last night.
- Shadow. Bottom. - l had my hand on the panties.
On the panties.
Drums, drums. Jones.
''Pop, Top 40, R&B, Urban Contemporary,
Easy Listening, Funk Love.''
Damn, you for real?
This shit is out.
Now, hold up. Let's talk about the money.
What about the money, Shadow?
What about the money?!
- We want more. - You're the spokesperson for everyone?
Yeah.
Even for Left Hand, who's late again?
Look, the point of the matter is we've been packing them in at the Dog, right?
Moe, Josh and Bleek have been bringing in cash dollars.
- Where's our raise? - You promised.
lt's long overdue.
- l'm talking to them. - He's working on it.
Yeah, well, maybe we need new management,
somebody who can get the terms we want.
You need to get your ears cleaned.
You don't understand. This is my band.
Read the marquee. lt says the Bleek, two ''E''s, one ''K'', Quintet.
When you're running things, you can do whatever you want.
lt won't be long from now.
lt won't be long, but until that magical, mystical day happens,
you do what the hell l say.
The midget should go, Bleek.
Fine. You manage then.
That's not my job. You're supposed to be taking care of me.
l'm the artist, midget rat bastard.
What does size have to do with it?
A lot.
You keep coming up short.
- Don't shove me. - Keep coming up short.
Sorry l'm late.
One more time, you're about 2.2 seconds from the unemployment line.
l'm sorry. l won't be late again.
A lot of piano players want your gig, a lot.
Sorry. New tune.
lt's a nice title.
All right, let's walk through this.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
as l travel through this great big country of ours, this US of A,
and being on the road as much as l do, l listen to a lot of radio stations.
lt's amazing how many KlSS or V103 stations there are.
Jesus Christ, did people run out of call letters, or what?
Come on.
Anyway, most of the stuff on the radio is so sad. lt's a drag.
One of the reasons could be because every song is about...
Oh, you guessed it, huh? Love.
Love.
L-O-V-E.
What the world needs now...
is not another love song.
Now, dig. Check this out.
The love that's professed in these songs is shaky anyway.
lt's a lustful, selfish, end-of-the-world love.
And the lyrics...
Have you tried to listen to the lyrics?
You heard them all before.
My love ls hlgher Flre and deslre
Let's stay together forever
Desplte all types of weather
Even a hurrlcane
ln fact, l'd spend a wlnter ln Chl town
And you know that's cold
Aln't no mountaln hlgh enough Aln't no rlver wlde enough
To keep me from gettln' to your good stuff
You know lt's rough
Racist?
Giant's not a racist.
Giant ain't no racist.
What a dope llke soap on a rope
l went for the okey doke You know thls ls true
He blew L-O-V-E, try S-E-X
l'll be a happy chappy Also nappy
l get the shlvers down to my llvers
Other guys just feed you lines, but l take you to Mickey D's.
Baby, l'm on my knees Please, baby, please
But thls aln't that song lt's gettln'long
My nature ls rlsln' to the horlzon
lt's strong as an ox Llke a Clorox box
You're a bad mama jama
But you already know that Just polnt me ln the rlght dlrectlon
Only you glve me that serlous connectlon
Get out of my dreams
Hey, midget. Petey's on the phone.
Thanks.
l know. l know. l know.
l can read. l went to school.
lt came as a surprlse You opened my eyes
Why? Because l love you
Let me spend the rest of my llfe wlth you, tonlght
lf you don't, l'll just roll up lnto a ball and just dle
- l know how you feel. - Won't wash, won't eat
Won't even go to work lf you don't love me do
l'll even glve up my four season tlckets
To the New York Knlcks, courtslde
And you know How l feel about basketball
That's got to be L-O-V-E
Let me call you my own Shower me wlth your cones
Let lt raln down on me llke a monsoon
Let your love come down, flow down
Drown me ln that stuff l want to swlm ln lt, do 20 laps
The breast stroke ls my speclalty
L-O-V-E
- Hi, beautiful. - Hey, babe.
- Peace. - Assalamu alalkum, brother.
l said, ''l'm going to kill you.'' l was going to kill him.
l had him up right against... Bleeky, hey.
Sit down. We've been meaning to talk to you. Join us.
- Our meat-and-potatoes man. - Bread and butter.
- l'm not talking corned beef. - Prime ribs.
- You want a cigar? - l don't want a cigar.
l don't want any meat and potatoes, either.
l want more money. l'm not happy. When l'm not happy, l don't play good.
When l don't play good, the music doesn't sound good.
lf the music doesn't sound good, nobody comes. We all lose our money.
We want you to be happy. You're a great talent.
But you got a lot of dead weight around your neck dragging you down.
And this so-called manager of yours, Giant, that's a joke.
He couldn't manage a Little League team.
When you're ready for some real management, come see us.
My first cousin, he's top shelf.
- He's short, but he's smart. - We love the guy.
He handles only the best, first class all the way, just like Josh and me.
- Filet mignon. - Dom Perignon. First class.
l'm here to talk about the great sums of money
that you two are making off my music and the little l see in return.
You're talking about management.
Giant, your manager, negotiated this deal, the one you agreed to.
lt's always been our business policy to never, ever renegotiate the deal.
Look, Giant is my friend, OK?
We all need close friends.
But this is business.
l trust him, which is more than l can say for your cousin...
Nobody can be trusted.
Everyone steals. Everyone is crooked.
You walk out with as much of your shirt on as possible.
- You know what this sounds like? - We like you.
- That's a good thing. - We have a binding contract.
This is real life. Think about what we said.
- l been thinking about it. - Sometimes you got to expand.
To a bigger club? Dizzy's maybe?
You have one of these?
lf you break that, l'll sue your ass, and you'll be out a lot of money.
Get the fuck out of here. That was a joke, but l would sue you.
They got all kind of people in this club. l ain't going to lie.
Look at that little ugly guy at the bar. Hey, fella!
That's Bleek Gilliam's manager.
Little Mr Magoo-looking fucker there.
You think l didn't see you back over there.
Trying to sneak in here in the coloured section. l see you sitting at the bar.
Yeah, that poor fucker.
l first met him trying out for the Oeltics a couple of years ago.
He got mad cos Robert Parish was on the team.
That Larry Bird told me. He ain't got nothing but a three-pointer.
That's all he needs.
Man walked in the doctor's office just stuttering.
''Doc, g-g-got to help me. My wife says she's going to leave me.''
''l-l-l'm stuttering l-l-l-like a goof.''
Doc says, ''Damn, l can barely stand to hear you talk myself.''
''Go in the examination room and pull off your clothes.''
''Let me see what's wrong with you.''
The doctor went in the examination room, looks between his legs,
says, ''My God. No wonder you can't talk.''
''All that is pulling on your vocal cords.''
''Put some of that on the table. Let me chop it off for you.''
The doc went whack. He says, ''Speak.''
''Thank you, Doctor.''
''My wife is going to love me. l sure appreciate this.''
Doc said, ''Damn, l'd appreciate it, too, if you'd pay the bill.''
''Come back in a couple of weeks. Let me see how you're doing.''
lndigo, does Bleek know you're here?
- No. He has no idea. - Are you sure?
l'm just gonna make sure.
Little while.
- What you listening to, man? - What?
- This is my brother's tape. - Bleek.
- This stuff is sad, man. - Can l see you for a second?
He's playing all the instruments.
What's up?
lndigo and Olarke just walked in.
- Yeah? All right, bet. - Remember that bet?
- What bet? - We were in Paris.
l urged you not to buy them the same dress.
You said it was a million-to-one shot
they wear the same dress on the same day and see each other.
Want to bet again? You owe me fiddy dollars. Fiddy.
Yeah. Yeah, that's er...
That's good looking-out, G-man.
That's what good managers are for.
- What are you going to do? - Er...
- What? l'm going to handle this. - This is a rough one.
- l got it. - The roughest of the roughest.
- Watch me work. - l'll be watching.
l'll watch this one.
How you doing, waitress? She's a nun.
Won't give me none, ain't had none,
told me she didn't need none.
l'm looking for a woman. l'm horny enough to fuck the crack of dawn.
That's right. l don't lie.
Right. There's some good-looking women in here
and some good-looking fellas.
How you doing, sir?
l'm a trisexual. l'll try your little ass tonight.
- You're so nasty. - Hey, girl, what's happening?
- Hey, how you doing? - Good. Enjoy.
- Thanks. - OK.
My, my, my. What a pleasant surprise.
- Hi. - Hi.
l been meaning to ask you something.
- What do you see in Bleek? - What?
l don't know what you see in him.
He's an all right cat, but...
- What about you? - What about me?
What about your career?
You should be upstage.
Yeah, l agree.
lf you can't get it here, you better call your cousin.
''l didn't come.'' Well, you should've called.
l'm from Mississippi, and l love it. l like being country. l ain't lying.
Ain't nothing like a good country lady.
Girl the other day, l was messing around with her breast. She got hot.
She said, ''Wouldn't you like something to go with this breast milk?''
l said, ''A good piece of cornbread would go just fine.''
l like being from the country.
Ain't nothing wrong with being from the country.
Not a damn thing wrong with it.
Waitress knows.
All those bad kids in her house.
Hey, baby.
What a pleasant surprise to see you here. l didn't expect to see you.
A big surprise.
Huh?
What? How so?
You nearly pissed in your pants when you saw me,
especially since you invited Olarke.
l didn't invite Olarke. Anyway, Shadow invited Olarke.
You always talk about how you don't want to come to the clubs.
l'm just surprised to see you here.
- l had a sudden change of heart. - l'm... l'm... l'm happy.
l'm happy.
But is she happy? ls she happy?
- l'm sorry. What? - ls she happy?
l like her dress, Bleek.
l love the way you sing.
You can really sing.
l'm starting my own band.
Yeah.
The Shadow Henderson Quartet,
featuring Miss Olarke Bentancourt.
l know you can't make that move right now, and this is cool,
but, Olarke, think about what l'm saying.
All Bleek cares about is Bleek.
- ls that so? - Oh, so that is.
Just take a look around.
lt seems to me that all Shadow cares about is Shadow.
Anything, anyone that overshadows him, he blocks them, like me.
l'm supposed to be the leader of this motherfucker, not Bleek.
But l'm not, so l have to get my own thing.
You know...
l know you love Bleek, and that's beautiful, black people in love.
l'd be the last person to come between you and him.
But at some point, you have to let this love shit go,
and you have to think about respect.
lf he doesn't respect you, then you don't need him.
OK?
All l ask is that you think about what l'm saying.
- Yeah, l'll think about it. - No. Think about it.